Valentine’s Day is around the corner and many single people will feel lonely and depressed during this time. It’s difficult to find love when you struggle to love yourself. If you’re struggling with mental health it can be difficult to see your own self-worth.
Looking around at other successful people you may be wondering why they all look so happy and how they became so successful. But the truth is everyone is struggling in some way. It may not be the same situations you’re dealing with but no one’s life is perfect.
You may not realise it but trauma is sometimes the main source of why people don’t like themselves. But what if we told you there are ways you can fall in love with yourself again? This self-help blog may be able to help you pinpoint that trauma so you can start working towards loving yourself. Keep reading to find out more.
Find Out What’s Causing Your Problem
The first step to finding self-love is by identifying why you have negative feelings towards yourself. One of the major causes of self-doubt or negative self-talk is PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder). You may find that PTSD affects your quality of life in many ways.
PTSD is caused by past trauma. Even though you feel like you’ve dealt with the past it may not be the case. With PTSD you may have the following symptoms:
- Unable to trust others
- Fear of getting too close to others
- Feelings of uselessness
- Easily defensive
- Low self-esteem
The best course of action would be to go for professional trauma therapy. By talking to a professional you’re able to identify what triggers your PTSD and how you can manage it effectively.
Therapy helps you deal with the past so that it doesn’t affect your present and your future. You’re able to finally let go of the past and focus more on your future.
If you don’t want to get asked loads of intrusive questions then consider IEMT therapy. This process doesn’t use the method of asking questions that need a direct answer such as the following:
- Why it happened
- How do you feel about it?
- Tell me about the event
You are only asked to rate your feelings on a scale of 1-10 and where you feel it in your body. The IEMT therapist is then able to give you exercises to help you let go of these traumas.
Take Some Time to Find Yourself Again
The best way to start loving yourself is to stop living in your comfort zone. Watching nighttime television and eating snacks might be fun for a little while but after some time you’ll start to feel down because you haven’t done anything worth talking about.
You need time away to find yourself again and meet new people. The best way to do that is to go on a solo retreat. A road trip will be the perfect way to help you manage your thoughts and find out what you truly love about life.
While you’re on your travels you can experience new cultures and make friends with people from all walks of life. You may find that doing something out of the ordinary will change your perspective on life and about yourself.
You’ll respect yourself more because you’ve proven that you can do anything you set your mind to. There will be times that you’ll be fearful of change or the unknown. But once you push yourself forward by doing something out of your comfort zone you’ll realise that it wasn’t that difficult.
Give Yourself a Digital Detox
Another major cause of negative self-talk and not loving oneself is social media. You may see pictures of happy couples or people travelling all the time. But this is not a true depiction of anyone’s life. Comparing yourself to others is a sure way to diminish your self-esteem.
So give yourself a major digital detox. Don’t go onto any of your social media sites for at least two weeks. Since you won’t be using social media often you’ll have more time to concentrate on yourself. There are many fun activities to do when you’re not looking at social media such as the following:
- Visiting a museum
- Going to see a new movie at the cinema
You’ll have more time to do more constructive activities with your time when you decide to step away from social media for a while. A great way to build up your confidence is by learning a new skill such as baking, painting, arts and crafts or learning a new language.
Doing a digital detox can be challenging especially if you’re used to looking at your phone all the time. It may require extensive self-discipline. On the other hand, there are plenty of self-help blogs, YouTube videos and people who can assist you in the process.
Let Go of Toxic People
Dealing with people who bring you down all the time will be extremely detrimental to your self-esteem. When people call you names you may start to believe them and this can harm your self-love.
You should let go of toxic people so that you don’t have to put up with their judgment. You deserve to be treated better so that you can build up your confidence. Only surround yourself with people who motivate you to do better.
Make Opportunities for Yourself
To create self-love is to develop a life that you’re proud of. But you can’t wait around for people to present opportunities for you. So make opportunities for yourself so that you can pursue your goals. You may have to study further to achieve your success or you may have to sacrifice your time.
In the end, it will be worth it because you’ll open up new opportunities that you didn’t have before. You may get that dream job you’ve always wanted or that trip overseas you’ve been dreaming of. By creating opportunities for yourself you automatically make your life exciting.
With an exciting life, you create fun stories to tell the people or you’ll meet like-minded individuals that you can be friends with. This process will increase your confidence and help you manage your time in a healthy way.
Don’t Be Afraid to Speak Your Mind
Some people with low self-esteem rarely speak up for themselves. They will let people talk down to them or cause drama in their lives. Do you feel you’re not strong enough to stand up for yourself? You’re not alone. Many people dread confrontations.
But, you don’t have to get into fights to stand your ground. It’s important to always be assertive and never let people cross your boundaries. By standing up for yourself you show that you have respect for yourself and in turn, you’ll gain friends that will also admire you for speaking boldly.
Developing self-love is not an easy task. However, by practicing the tips in today’s article you’ll be able to work on your self-love every day. The brain is adaptable and this means you’re able to change your thought patterns by repeating positive habits. These positive habits don’t have to be activities, they can also be mantras.
Self-love takes time and patience. To help you with your process you can always book a session with Jacquie Case today. With the correct coaching with Jacquie Case, you’ll be able to rid your life of fear, anxiety, phobias and find your purpose by developing a healthy mindset.
Are you ready to change your life and start loving yourself again? Leave a comment below and let us know how you practice self-love no matter how small it is. We’re always happy to hear from our readers.